flooded feelings

Feelings are powerful aren't they?
When you try to ignore them or squash them, they provoke and come back at you. They even squeak out physically, in your tone of voice or body language and the more you try to keep your feelings from showing, the stronger the pressure to express them. It is as though you are creating a dam - a wall, to hold back the flood.

The flood of feelings is a bit like an overflowing bath: the flow of emotions ripple and whirl and overflow; seeping through the floor into the next room of your life, communicating the problem with a steady constant drip. You can place a bucket under the drip and this is a messy, superficial solution. Learning some improved communication techniques helps a lot and this will show you how to turn off the tap and give you time to clean up. Once the crisis is over, and the steam clears, it is clear that even this is just a temporary solution to a symptom of a full bath of swirling emotions.

At the slightest twist or wrong turn, your automatic reaction to something that feels dirty, compels you to turn the tap on again and as the bath is still full and ready to bubble up, the water overflows once more.

It isn't until you delve deep and discover the source of the problem and release the block and unplug the bath that the tears dry up for good.

Releasing the emotions and letting go of the old water, so it flows away, leaves you a space to cleanse and revitalise.

Constantly sensing and identifying how the water feels and remaining vigilant to the levels, will encourage you tune in, observe and manage your feelings. Expressing and releasing a fresh flow of emotions feels good! It is key to effective communication and harmonious relationships and it is vital for your health, as squashed emotions stay blocked within your body and in the long term, lead to stress, anxiety, depression and physical ailments.

The amazing thing is that you do not squash your feelings on purpose and often you don't even know you are doing it! We are brought up to believe that it is 'not nice' to show ugly feelings of anger or jealousy and it is seen as childish and unprofessional to express joy and laughter. I recently unravelled some feelings of anger which I had been unaware that I was squashing. A friend spotted my face turning red as I spoke about a situation with a very calm tone of voice! The fantastic thing is that through a magical NLP technique, I uncovered the core of this anger and released it, leaving me to feel free and open again. Sometimes we just need a good friend, an objective, non-judgemental viewpoint to reflect what is happening for you and to delve deeply. There is some incredible research and discoveries that have lead to improved processes and techniques to heal past issues and blocked emotions quickly and easily. The irony is that if you are squashing your emotions un-knowingly, you won't be looking for the processes and information to unblock them!

So what can you do to become more aware of the signs that you are squashing and blocking your feelings?

- notice when your reactions are disproportionate to the situation
- feel your body, especially muscle tension in your shoulders and chest
- listen to your breathing
- feel your pulse
- tune into the tone of your voice as you are speaking with difficult people
- when you notice a feeling coming up - observe it- without control
- observe the response you are getting from your communication
- ask yourself and others if you feel you are hiding or squashing something

When you are aware that you are squashing and blocking your feelings, you can begin to take control and find the resources which leave you free for more effective, clear communication for more effective, vital and fulfilling relationships.